A Theurgist is a character designed specifically to heal the team. When she/he does this they do so by virtue of logic. If you want to say "thanks" then do so, although saying "thanks" isn't necessary. If you don't get a reply of "you're welcome" don't get bent out of shape about it. Real gratitude isn't in what you say. Real gratitude is in what you do. Happy Healing Theurgists.
A Theurgist is a character designed specifically to heal the team. When she/he does this they do so by virtue of logic. If you want to say "thanks" then do so, although saying "thanks" isn't necessary. If you don't get a reply of "you're welcome" don't get bent out of shape about it. Real gratitude isn't in what you say. Real gratitude is in what you do. Happy Healing Theurgists.
It's a little more than just healing, it's related to invoking the power of Gods to protect and create in a divine way. It's the opposite of Goetia which is summoning or evoking power through demons. It is just as much healing as calling for power to protect in ways like invoking statues to life in order to protect nature, goodness and life.* The magic and rituals of a Theurgist eventually lead to their soul's inner divinity knitting together with the divinity of the Gods. It's quite beautiful
*When Professor McGonagall invoked the statues of Hogwarts to life so they could protect the students of Hogwarts it was an example of Theurgy in defence of goodness but not of a 'healing' nature. Theurgists do not have to be purely healers, they can take a position of offence to protect
As for 'thanks' and 'you're welcome' it can be nice, it can also get a wee bit daft when there is a lot of healing going on lol. We can all thank each other for good team work - great hit, awesome set up, nice heal etc. Thanking is all good but the best thing is working together nicely and winning the battle as a united team. Thank me or not....I will still make sure you survive for drops!
While a main component of Theurgist's role involves healing, one always seem to forget that they can attack too. The school now has the potential of reaching high damage % stats and this shouldn't be ignored.
It seems many persons are guilty of the notion of expecting a to always be healing and not attacking, even introducing slurs in attempt to back up their remark.
This as we now know is no longer the case and as such, we must grow as a community and go beyond that basic school stereo-type thinking.
You make a decent point about the whole idea of gratification as well.
I find some amount of persons do get offended when they're not thanked for their effort - which is again why many opted to forgo healing.
It's a little more than just healing, it's related to invoking the power of Gods to protect and create in a divine way. It's the opposite of Goetia which is summoning or evoking power through demons. It is just as much healing as calling for power to protect in ways like invoking statues to life in order to protect nature, goodness and life.* The magic and rituals of a Theurgist eventually lead to their soul's inner divinity knitting together with the divinity of the Gods. It's quite beautiful
*When Professor McGonagall invoked the statues of Hogwarts to life so they could protect the students of Hogwarts it was an example of Theurgy in defence of goodness but not of a 'healing' nature. Theurgists do not have to be purely healers, they can take a position of offence to protect
As for 'thanks' and 'you're welcome' it can be nice, it can also get a wee bit daft when there is a lot of healing going on lol. We can all thank each other for good team work - great hit, awesome set up, nice heal etc. Thanking is all good but the best thing is working together nicely and winning the battle as a united team. Thank me or not....I will still make sure you survive for drops!
Happy Healing and Good Luck on Drops Everyone!
If it's a personal heal when I need it, I think it's polite to thank the healer ( Theurgist or other ). For at least this one good reason, they gave up a round to help you, instead of attacking.
Time for a Theurgist to step into this conversation.
When I'm in a team-up I ALWAYS equip my healing deck. It is stuffed full of healing spells and (aside from the Tower of the Helaphunt) has never let a team down. That said, I am at the mercy of a random draw just like everyone else.
A few things to consider, if I just healed one team mate, it's going to take two more rounds before I have enough pips to heal you as well. I DO keep an eye on the life circle indicator and usually have you healed as soon as I can, starting from the team mate who needs it most.
Please also understand that if everyone on the team is over the halfway mark and I can end the battle with a Forest Lord attack, I am going to do that instead of prolonging the battle to heal one person.
If you join up with me on mob boss fight on a pure whim, I do NOT have my healing deck equipped. I may not have a heal ready to go.
I can only speak for myself, but I believe that as a general rule all Theurgists behave in the same manner. We are going to do everything we can to keep you alive.
If I can't and you need to flee to down a potion, I do promise that I will not the end the battle until you get back.
If it's a personal heal when I need it, I think it's polite to thank the healer ( Theurgist or other ). For at least this one good reason, they gave up a round to help you, instead of attacking.
Yes, saying thanks is nice
As a healer though, if you didn't say thanks to me I wouldn't think you were rude or ungrateful. When I'm in a team as their healer/set-up minion I do my job joyfully. We all benefit from someone giving the main hitter a blade but we seldom hear thanks for it because it's part of team work. I'm not sure why heals are often seen as more important, or why some healers want it to be seen as more important.
Whatever I do in a battle when compliments come my way I like to make it a team compliment rather than personal. EG when someone compliments my hit, I thank the set up.
We're a team and in it together, working for a common goal.
Also try to look at someone's intention not only their words.
Some people's way of saying thank you or you are welcome might differ from other people's way.
For instance someone thanked me for helping in a dungeon and I said no bother, I had some time to kill and wanted the badge. That wasn't sarcasm or dismissal it was my way of trying to remove them from feeling the burden of shame or obligation that they were being helped.
They took it wrong and got upset and told me I could've just said you are welcome in a nice way.
Sigh
Don't see bad intentions where there were none. Also 'actions speak louder than words.' The other person in the dungeon ditched us and I stayed until the end.
Do pretty words matter or do pretty deeds?
The above was on topic and not aimed at anybody. Just wanted to share another perspective.
As for a Life wizard's 'duty' just because they have heal spells does not mean otehrs can tell them how to play or what to do. I see that a lot in team ups -- someone who is a total strangers telling another total stranger what to do. If it's not that person's quest or they're not even in the first spot (which takes more damage and goes first so is understandable if they try to work out a strategy with the team), don't give orders. Even if you do tell others what to do, then give it as a please or a request, not a command.
It's always nice if anyone blades or shields or heals us and it's always best to thank them but sometimes remember people have real life distractions, or are in a rush, or simply forgot. A thank you is a gift just as the blade or shield or healing was a gift. Treat it accordingly, something to be appreciated but not expected.
Again this was to topic and not aimed at anybody. I have a Life wizard and I try to help in the way that makes the most sense at the time, and be a team player as much as is possible. And sometimes what makes sense in any of the Wiz battles, is a quick kill and over with.
As for a Life wizard's 'duty' just because they have heal spells does not mean otehrs can tell them how to play or what to do. I see that a lot in team ups -- someone who is a total strangers telling another total stranger what to do. If it's not that person's quest or they're not even in the first spot (which takes more damage and goes first so is understandable if they try to work out a strategy with the team), don't give orders. Even if you do tell others what to do, then give it as a please or a request, not a command.
It's always nice if anyone blades or shields or heals us and it's always best to thank them but sometimes remember people have real life distractions, or are in a rush, or simply forgot. A thank you is a gift just as the blade or shield or healing was a gift. Treat it accordingly, something to be appreciated but not expected.
Again this was to topic and not aimed at anybody. I have a Life wizard and I try to help in the way that makes the most sense at the time, and be a team player as much as is possible. And sometimes what makes sense in any of the Wiz battles, is a quick kill and over with.
I've come across this a lot too. It is quite irritating when someone is telling us to kill or heal on command....especially when they have no clue about how many pips you'll need, how much damage you'll deal or what set up you still have to add.
I heard a girl deal with this quite effectively. She simply said, "If you want to play more than one wizard make another account." Then continued to play her wizard as she saw fit...which she did very competently and effectively as a team player.
If I want someone to do something I tend to ask 'Could you...?' or 'Can anyone...?' so it's a request instead of an instruction. They also know it's no big deal to say 'no' because it's asking what they have available rather than expecting them to have mind-read our strategy and had the card up in anticipation. With friends that can go out the window and any of us might just say 'shatter' or 'feint' etc but mainly because we're all chatting and know the battle inside out and backwards
Sometimes people get so sensitive about things and reading typed messages we hear the tone WE apply to it. Almost all messages can be read with multiple different tones. I've seen people get uppitty about things that everyone else had read as nice or at least, inoffensive. I've no idea why the person in the dungeon (your previous post to the one quoted) would have found it offensive that you joined because you had time and wanted to get a badge. It can be so weird when things like that happen but I guess we'll never understand everyone
Also try to look at someone's intention not only their words.
Some people's way of saying thank you or you are welcome might differ from other people's way.
For instance someone thanked me for helping in a dungeon and I said no bother, I had some time to kill and wanted the badge. That wasn't sarcasm or dismissal it was my way of trying to remove them from feeling the burden of shame or obligation that they were being helped.
They took it wrong and got upset and told me I could've just said you are welcome in a nice way.
Sigh
Don't see bad intentions where there were none. Also 'actions speak louder than words.' The other person in the dungeon ditched us and I stayed until the end.
Do pretty words matter or do pretty deeds?
The above was on topic and not aimed at anybody. Just wanted to share another perspective.
I'm sorry but that reply did seem a bit dismissive ( though you didn't intend it ). Wouldn't be better to say, "I'm glad to help"? ( This is my response to those thanking me in P101 team-ups. Then I wish them luck on their further quests. ) Since most of our "actions" are governed by the coding in the game, our words become more important than they would in a real life situation.
A Theurgist is a character designed specifically to heal the team. When she/he does this they do so by virtue of logic. If you want to say "thanks" then do so, although saying "thanks" isn't necessary. If you don't get a reply of "you're welcome" don't get bent out of shape about it. Real gratitude isn't in what you say. Real gratitude is in what you do. Happy Healing Theurgists.
I tutor international students at the college level. Because of so much exposure to other languages and cultures, I can safely say that being sticklers about "please," "thank you" and "you're welcome" is very much an English-speaking and possibly only an American obsession.
Americans expect a please, and then a thank you, followed by: you're welcome. Not following this protocol is taken as being very rude. People from other cultures tend not to worry so much about this. They wonder why Americans are so caught up in these magic little words, and meanwhile, Americans get wounded when the magic little words don't flow. It can cause problems in dungeons because people may come from different cultures and have different expectations regarding polite behavior.
For me, it's ingrained to "ty" and "yw" or "np" in dungeons when someone heals or blades me. (It's faster to type the abbreviations; "np" stands for "No problem.") I tend to do it automatically, but don't fret at all if I get no response back. Especially it's nuts to get upset over the lack of "you're welcome."
When I'm tutoring and this topic comes up - you'd be surprised how often! - I just explain it as I did here: Americans are very particular about saying please and thank you, and about being punctual. I don't know why. Just go with it.
Also try to look at someone's intention not only their words.
Some people's way of saying thank you or you are welcome might differ from other people's way.
For instance someone thanked me for helping in a dungeon and I said no bother, I had some time to kill and wanted the badge. That wasn't sarcasm or dismissal it was my way of trying to remove them from feeling the burden of shame or obligation that they were being helped.
They took it wrong and got upset and told me I could've just said you are welcome in a nice way.
Sigh
Don't see bad intentions where there were none. Also 'actions speak louder than words.' The other person in the dungeon ditched us and I stayed until the end.
Do pretty words matter or do pretty deeds?
The above was on topic and not aimed at anybody. Just wanted to share another perspective.
"For instance someone thanked me for helping in a dungeon and I said no bother, I had some time to kill and wanted the badge.
They took it wrong and got upset and told me I could've just said you are welcome in a nice way."
Since I spend so much time teaching non-native English speakers the nuances of the English language, I can see why you thought this was an okay response, and why the other person took offense.
Hopefully you won't feel attacked by this explanation, my goal is to help you see it in a different light so you can understand where they were coming from.
Your motives, of course, were typical. Many nights when I'm bored and have an hour to kill, I will log in my Ice (she's the team-up champ) and hit a few battles at the kiosk. I always go equipped for full support, which makes her a weird Ice/Balance hybrid wizard equipped with blades, traps, feints, Cleanse Charms, Availing Hands, etc. She's there to help. My reason for being there is alleviating my own personal boredom, yes. But when someone thanks me, I always say I'm glad to help and leave out the "I'm just killing time" part (even though it's true).
Why?
Because, by saying that I'm actually there for another reason I reduce the person that I've helped to a stepping stone that I'm using for my own purposes. It demeans them a little. "I'm only here because I'm killing time" means that other person is not important and if I actually had something better to do, I wouldn't be bothering with them. Hopefully you can see why that might hurt someone's feelings.
Or, to put it another way: "No problem. I've been working on my Team Leader badge and discovered that I really enjoy helping others. I've met great people and made a lot of friends doing this!" (That is also true and, bonus! it makes the person feel good that they asked for help. It's like they've done me a favor. )
I'm sorry but that reply did seem a bit dismissive ( though you didn't intend it ). Wouldn't be better to say, "I'm glad to help"? ( This is my response to those thanking me in P101 team-ups. Then I wish them luck on their further quests. ) Since most of our "actions" are governed by the coding in the game, our words become more important than they would in a real life situation.
Thank you for your feedback and thank you also Victoria FireHeart for yours.
It is interesting to me also in that two posts replying to the same post of mine, immediately beside each other, have polar opposite reactions to the exchange I described in my post.
I'm reminded of the parable of the blindfolded men and the elephant often when people discuss personal perspectives/opinion -- it's all so subjective. But the parable illustrates that often we only have our own experience and perspective, we lack information or cannot 'see' the bigger picture. I try to remind myself of that often as well but I think it's difficult to have any perspective but our own and based upon our own prior or current direct experiences.
What seems sour to one is sweet to the next...intolerable to one is laughable to another...etc.
In the context of the exchange I described, from my personal perspective, neither of the others were especially talkative or 'friendly' and I felt I was doing most of the social upkeep. So when one thanked me it seemed, to me, to be a token effort, and I didn't want to overstate things, with a sentimental reply. I also felt uncomfortable that the person was not only telling me I should say "you're welcome," but told me exactly how I should say it. This was in a very long dungeon in which when I first arrived I expressed surprise and said I wasn't prepared and hadn't known it was a many room instance. They told me it wasn't, it was quick (it was long.) I stayed anyway. Once the other one left, the one who schooled me on proper you're-welcomes became a bit friendlier. I would've stayed regardless unless they were a horribly toxic bully of course. (They weren't.)
There was also a lot of mild joking/sarcasm on his part so I wasn't sure if his lesson in you're-welcomes was another example of that. Also when I'm playing the male wizard I've noticed other 'male wizards' get uncomfortable if I get too polite or 'mushy' so I was trying to joke a bit too.
I'm sorry but that reply did seem a bit dismissive ( though you didn't intend it ). Wouldn't be better to say, "I'm glad to help"? ( This is my response to those thanking me in P101 team-ups. Then I wish them luck on their further quests. ) Since most of our "actions" are governed by the coding in the game, our words become more important than they would in a real life situation.
I did actually say that I was happy to help earlier on without being thanked, and I said you're very welcome at the end before I left. Just more info.
His response was an overly flowery way of saying thank you to the extent it seemed he was joking about it. I can't be sure. It's difficult, as yourself and Victoria have both noted, to express the tone we intended, in print.
Although Life Wizards do have the most healing spells, I feel like they shouldn’t feel obligated to only heal. On my Life Wizard, I mostly just do damage instead of healing, and I’ve been successful so far. Also, about people saying thanks, I feel like it is nice for people to acknowledge your effort in healing them.
I play Life wizards and I know how it is to be used as and healing tool without a positive feedback such as thank you for your help. It's not fun. Healers should not be demanded or taken to much for granted and timing doesn't always work in your favor. There are times when healers may not have the pips or the spell in hand to heal you at the time you need one. Specially in really challenging battles when more damage to done to the a team faster than a healer can keep up with the pips. That's when teamwork comes in to play Most life wizards don't carry just heals in their deck and should they. They want to fight too. I only equip my healing deck when take on a challenging battle with a team. Life wizards are not almighty and the worse they want to hear are criticisms from ones expectation that are not met. When that happen, most likely that healer will not put the effort in trying to help you again. So yea, feedback plays a hug role.
"For instance someone thanked me for helping in a dungeon and I said no bother, I had some time to kill and wanted the badge.
They took it wrong and got upset and told me I could've just said you are welcome in a nice way."
Since I spend so much time teaching non-native English speakers the nuances of the English language, I can see why you thought this was an okay response, and why the other person took offense.
Hopefully you won't feel attacked by this explanation, my goal is to help you see it in a different light so you can understand where they were coming from.
Your motives, of course, were typical. Many nights when I'm bored and have an hour to kill, I will log in my Ice (she's the team-up champ) and hit a few battles at the kiosk. I always go equipped for full support, which makes her a weird Ice/Balance hybrid wizard equipped with blades, traps, feints, Cleanse Charms, Availing Hands, etc. She's there to help. My reason for being there is alleviating my own personal boredom, yes. But when someone thanks me, I always say I'm glad to help and leave out the "I'm just killing time" part (even though it's true).
Why?
Because, by saying that I'm actually there for another reason I reduce the person that I've helped to a stepping stone that I'm using for my own purposes. It demeans them a little. "I'm only here because I'm killing time" means that other person is not important and if I actually had something better to do, I wouldn't be bothering with them. Hopefully you can see why that might hurt someone's feelings.
Or, to put it another way: "No problem. I've been working on my Team Leader badge and discovered that I really enjoy helping others. I've met great people and made a lot of friends doing this!" (That is also true and, bonus! it makes the person feel good that they asked for help. It's like they've done me a favor. )
Alia Misthaven / Sierra Winterbreeze, Team Player
OK? Subtlety of language.
A friend (not a BFF but slightly more than an acquaintance) you know has been struggling lately, lives an hour away. They can't afford lunch. You stop by with their favorite to-go coffee and sandwich. They say "Thank you!" You say "It's OK, I was headed this way anyway." You both know you were not headed that way anyway and that even if you were, you're doing more than the friend would expect. You could've said a rote "you're welcome" and changed the topic. Instead you do not wish the friend to feel what is known as "the bread of shame" (Kabbalah) or "social debt" in sociological terms. So you said something like "It's OK" or "No big deal," which has the opposite effect of "reducing" or "demeaning" them -- it liberates them from feeling like a beggar, or feeling any obligation to 'repay.'
Cultural differences?
There is no such thing as one "American" culture. There are numerous regional cultures. Then factor in familial acculturation, socializing based on era (e.g. did they grow up pre or post internet? pre or post Tv, even? chat room? texting?), and hybrid acculturations also based upon religion, heritage etc. (I'm a plain spoken German-American even though my ancestors got here in the mid 1800s. That's how I see myself. I'm also a former Midwesterner -- if I promise it I will do it! And more besides, and make sure you know it was no skin off my nose so you don't feel icky.)
I didn't say all he said or all I said. I left hints and synopses and hoped for benefit of the doubt here. I didn't get it. Without being there the full hour plus, and seeing all that was said, done, etc., how can anyone judge me? Also real life context. It was physically difficult for me to stay but I stayed. I was told it would be a "very short" battle and it was an hour plus dungeon. You want me to type a full paragraph in 'you're welcome' Alia in a long dungeon with people racing from boss to boss? Not practical. Also wouldn't have fit the tone he set up.
I'm British and we can be quite petty over P's and Q's...but in a game when everything is written we don't have the same information as we do in real life interactions.
If we hold a door for someone and they don't acknowledge it we can feel irritated. However, if that person is a small child, elderly and struggling or seems distracted in some way, we can be more understanding and less picky. Equally a smile is recognised as a 'thanks'.
Sometimes in real life someone may not even notice we did something 'for' them, but we see the bigger picture because it's right in front of us. The mum with 3 small children may not notice us side step to block a door so Little Timmy doesn't leave the shop while she's juggling the twins haha. We don't mind that she didn't thank us; we can see she is distracted.
In game we don't know who is behind the wizard. We don't know what else is going on in the room or building they are playing from. We don't know if they even saw us heal them because they might have been running to the bathroom
I see both sides and recognise that we each have our own preferences with acknowledging our contribution within a team. I also think it's good for us to remember we don't have full information on who they are, where they are, their body language, facial expression or their intended tone when they type. Assuming we're appreciated and everything is good may sound like I am taking the 'high ground' but in all honesty it's the most selfish attitude to have because it gives me the happiest experiences haha
If I assume the best and someone was being deliberately rude they make sure I know they wanted to be mean...which is fine because I don't value mean spirited opinions anyway
We can't change the way others communicate but we can choose how we react to it It doesn't fit perfectly here but I LOVE Hanlon's Razor "Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity"
TLDR: I'm too selfish to ruin my gaming fun by taking offence
I try to assume the best as well Victoria and try also to look for intention rather than literal translations -- as you've wisely pointed out we don't know the person 'behind the wizard' or the context they are in (not only socially or culturally but physically and situation-wise.)
People in real life, behind the wizards, may have trouble discerning 'social cues' for many reasons which I won't list here but can be extrapolated by the reader. They may have different social values or contexts for many reasons as well.
Distractions. Yes! Victoria there is a Santa Claus! I mean many distractions in real life as well. I've had my pet jumping on my arm, I've had people talking at the back or side of my head urgently or loudly, I've had all sort of distractions while online or in Wiz 101. Fire engines screaming past, as well. Physical difficulties. People may have a hard time typing or they may be slow typists, for many reasons. They may be experiencing pain or motor control issues. They may be experiencing discomfort of various degrees and again for many potential reasons.
There can be no hard and fast "manners" in a multi cultural global community, in my opinion, other than obviously don't troll or harass or curse at people, etc.
And that is the only reason I would ever react to someone negatively in the moment, which might either be expressing hurt or simply and silently adding them to my Ignore list and/or reporting them (depending on seriousness of infraction -- such as outright harassment/abuse.) Other than that I assume their best intentions and keep it moving.
We're here to play a game after all...Also I'm somewhat of an existentialist in that I believe actions 'speak louder than words' -- and I also try not to judge people if I wasn't even there myself.
I had no problem with healing, blading or otherwise protecting this person. As a Theurgist I was thrilled to do so, but she got bent out of shape when I didn't respond to her "thank you" with a "you're welcome". I'm not talking about someone holding a door open for someone else or feeding a not-so-fortunate friend or etiquette class. I'm talking about Wizard101, a game and although I take my character and her abilities seriously, I'm not going to say "thank you" if you heal me or "you're welcome" if I heal you. I will show my gratitude by helping other wizards save the Spiral. Words aren't necessary for that. Happy Healing Theurgists
I had no problem with healing, blading or otherwise protecting this person. As a Theurgist I was thrilled to do so, but she got bent out of shape when I didn't respond to her "thank you" with a "you're welcome". I'm not talking about someone holding a door open for someone else or feeding a not-so-fortunate friend or etiquette class. I'm talking about Wizard101, a game and although I take my character and her abilities seriously, I'm not going to say "thank you" if you heal me or "you're welcome" if I heal you. I will show my gratitude by helping other wizards save the Spiral. Words aren't necessary for that. Happy Healing Theurgists
You want to see when I deal more damage than some other schools of my level and they're like "wow", so shocking apparently that Life can actually attack.
to always be healing and not attacking, even introducing slurs in attempt to 
Alia Misthaven
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