The notion is that KingsIsle might look into creating a series of joke wands, perhaps as an April fools day release. The wands need not have good stats, just an amusing image. Players who appreciate the joke can stitch the joke wand image onto whatever mega stat wand they prefer.
There would basically be one joke wand per school, with an image that suggests that school in an ironic way. I have a list of suggestions, some are better than others. Readers please feel free to chime in with funnier ideas than these.
Storm: a water bucket. This was not my idea, but Dylan Windwalker's from the central thread. I also suggested an umbrella, but I think the water bucket is better.
Ice: an ice bucket. Kinda stealing the storm idea, isn't quite as ironic for ice. Maybe an ice cube tray.
Fire: a blowtorch? Or maybe a box of matches?
Balance: a bathroom scale.
Myth: a whistle or gong (for summoning minions). I am not entirely sold on this concept.
Life: a doctor's black bag. Or maybe a gardener's trowel.
Death: this is hard. A skull would certainly suggest death, but is not ironic. Perhaps a parasol -- one of those sun umbrellas that help the user maintain milky pale skin -- the reference is really too obscure. A broken cross -- someone might be offended. A pack of black laundry dye -- perfect, except how do you draw it so it's clear what it is?
Re: KingsIsle, please give us a set of joke wands.
If i could pick a joke wand- i would want a dog poop bag. You would throw it, and it would open and splatter on your enemies, and leave them in like brown sticky dust.
When thrown it would make that goat screeching meme sound animation. If it had to have stats- here is what i would do
Re: KingsIsle, please give us a set of joke wands.
Lukeskywalker1313 on Dec 8, 2020 wrote:
If i could pick a joke wand- i would want a dog poop bag. You would throw it, and it would open and splatter on your enemies, and leave them in like brown sticky dust.
When thrown it would make that goat screeching meme sound animation. If it had to have stats- here is what i would do
Re: KingsIsle, please give us a set of joke wands.
I'll take another stab at a death joke wand. The wand appears to be a small black colored packet, vaguely but identifiably shaped like an oblong rectangle with rounded corners. One flap of the packet might be turned up, suggesting the wizard is opening it. The packet might actually have "Laundry dye: black", or just "Dye" or a partial label "...dry Dye: B..." visibly printed on it. At the wizard's feet are 2-3 identical packets, in non-black colors, suggesting the wizard deliberately chose black as his favored color. The wand might give 3-5 wand blasts, do fairly standard death damage for the item's level, or maybe a little less (but damage, not life stealing), considering the usefulness of the item cards. The wand gives 1-2 item cards, each casts a version of the fire spell "smokescreen" that costs 1 pip, gives a higher than normal smokescreen accuracy reduction (say 75%) but only affects a single target. The animation for the wand blasts and the smokescreen is the same, the wizard is shown throwing the packet at the target, with the packet coming apart in mid-air and enveloping the target in a cloud of fine black dust.
